Hello future me!
Cami and I decided to mess around with Sam and Danny, and we told them we would block them forever and never speak to them again. In reality Cami and I both had to log off for a a couple of hours, and we would tell them it was a joke when we got back.
We did as we told each other we would, and played the prank on the boys, except things didn't exactly go as planned for me.
When I got back Cami told me how they had been spamming and asking her for forgiveness the whole time she was playing the prank. I went to check if they had done the same for me, and realized that I had no messages from them about anything- besides 3 messages from Sam that were actually meant for Cami.
And then I started to wonder, do they care for her more than me? What am I doing wrong? What do I change about myself to make them care for me? Should I show them my face? Would that make them like me?
I thought all these questions, things I should do to MYSELF, as if I am the issue in this situation.
But then again, she has shown her face, and given more to them than I ever have.
I'm super confused on what I should do, and I am having a lot of conflict on which way is the right way.
My options put into short words:
Show them my face and feel like I have no respect for myself, but at the same time giving them something they have wanted forever, (And have gotten from Cami)
or,
Recognizing that they should love me besides any decision I make, and support me through it without a doubt.
January 19, 2015
January 14, 2015
To Defend Or Not To Defend
Hello future me!
Today I'm going to write another journal/diary type post.
In the begging of this school year, two new kids, both a girl and a boy, joined my school.
The girl- who for the sake of anonymity I will call Squitchy- became my best friend really quickly. We had so much in common, and we loved/love talking to each other.
The boy, who's name is Joey, was a total jerk. He insulted anyone and everyone- especially my Squitchy.
He spreads rumors about her, gets his friends to talk bad about her to her face, and calls/texts her the most horrid names.
She told me that it's really been bothering her, but every time I mention telling an adult, she puts it off and convinces me not to... And this is where you guys come into play.
I want you to give me some advice. I am struggling to decide whether to just listen to what she's saying and not tell anyone, or tell an adult, and go against what she wants- even if it will get her mad at me.
I have considered telling Joey and his pathetic friends to screw off, but just because I don't want hate on her, doesn't mean I want it on me either. Believe me- Joey is a real handful. Glaring, gossip, rumors and ect. I don't want me telling him to screw off to make it worse for her.
Please leave a comment down below with your advice... I can really use it in this tricky situation I'm in.
Today I'm going to write another journal/diary type post.
In the begging of this school year, two new kids, both a girl and a boy, joined my school.
The girl- who for the sake of anonymity I will call Squitchy- became my best friend really quickly. We had so much in common, and we loved/love talking to each other.
The boy, who's name is Joey, was a total jerk. He insulted anyone and everyone- especially my Squitchy.
He spreads rumors about her, gets his friends to talk bad about her to her face, and calls/texts her the most horrid names.
She told me that it's really been bothering her, but every time I mention telling an adult, she puts it off and convinces me not to... And this is where you guys come into play.
I want you to give me some advice. I am struggling to decide whether to just listen to what she's saying and not tell anyone, or tell an adult, and go against what she wants- even if it will get her mad at me.
I have considered telling Joey and his pathetic friends to screw off, but just because I don't want hate on her, doesn't mean I want it on me either. Believe me- Joey is a real handful. Glaring, gossip, rumors and ect. I don't want me telling him to screw off to make it worse for her.
Please leave a comment down below with your advice... I can really use it in this tricky situation I'm in.
January 13, 2015
Q & A- Selenator's View
Hello future me!
Just a warning before I start the post, but today's a different one.
For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, I'll go into deeper detail for you.
I was nominated by a lovely blogger here to answer some questions for I assume you relators! I hope you guys enjoy reading these, and get to know a little bit more about me.
Thank you to Selenator'sView for these great questions! I had a lot of fun answering them.
Now onto the Q&A:
Just a warning before I start the post, but today's a different one.
For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, I'll go into deeper detail for you.
I was nominated by a lovely blogger here to answer some questions for I assume you relators! I hope you guys enjoy reading these, and get to know a little bit more about me.
Thank you to Selenator'sView for these great questions! I had a lot of fun answering them.
Now onto the Q&A:
1. What was your favorite film of 2014?
A- I actually am not a big fan of movies, and I don't watch many. Although if I had to pick the answer would be Divergent or The Giver- for sure!
2. Who is your favorite actress?
A- Same issue with the whole disliking movies scenario. Don't have one!
3. Do you belong to a fandom?
A- Totally part of the Divergent fandom! I'm in love with the series.
4. Who is your favourite Disney character?
A- Ariel or Belle. Ariel because she's independent and knows what she wants, and Belle because she loves books and has a very strong character.
5. Do you have any pets?
A- Yup! 5 of them!
6. Book or Film?
A- Books, duh.
7. On Demand or DVD?
A- On demand! DVD's always get all scratched up and require maintenance.
8. Do you have Twitter?
A- Yes I do! Here's my link: https://twitter.com/Girlonline34 I post quite frequently. Follow me!
9. Where is your ideal holiday destination?
A- I don't know really. I'm terrified of airplanes and get major anxiety when I just think about them... *Shiver*
10. How long have you been blogging?
A- Less then a month, but I'm really enjoying this so far. I plan on doing this for a really long time.
11. What was your favourite blog post to write?
A- A diary type one where I can just write things that happened to me, and how I feel about certain people. (Ex: My blog post called 'Bullies.')
Answer some of these on your own down below! I really enjoy hearing from you and reading your replies.
January 11, 2015
Insecurities
"My nose is too big. I wish it was smaller."
"My eyebrows are too sparse. I wish they were fuller."
"My lips are too thin. I wish they were plump."
"My eyes are too almond shaped. I wish they would tone it down a bit."
"My eyelashes are not long enough. I wish they were longer."
"My ears poke out too much. I wish they turned in more."
"My face is too long. I wish it was shorter."
"My shoulders are too broad for a girl. I wish they were more feminine."
"My arms are fat. I wish they were skinnier."
"My torso is too curvy. I wish I could straighten it."
"My hips are too wide. I wish they wouldn't be so big."
"My thighs are too big. I wish they were smaller."
"I could afford to loose weight. I wish I was skinny."
"My calves have such dry skin. I wish they were moisturized and smooth."
"My feet are too long and too wide. I wish they were a normal size."
These are some of the things I have to go through and think of daily.
"I'm never good enough.", I tell myself.
• • •
Society wants you to be perfect.
They want you to have flawless skin, perfectly long hair, the perfect amount of curves, and to be completely feminine. (If you're a girl, that is.)
Simply perfect.
I'm not going to tell you to screw what society thinks, because not only would I be a hypocrite, but it's hard to do. Nearly impossible.
Although, I will tell you not to be your worst bully.
Do not make the same mistakes as me, and constantly put yourself down because you do not feel like you are "enough."
You are beautiful.
Some one out there loves you to death, and that alone is enough.
You are worth so much to the world, and you are like a drop of water in an ocean. Without you, the ocean would not seem to have a big affect in it's outer appearance, but the ocean is not the same, and can never be the same.
Can never be as full and plentiful- or completely complete.
Can never be as full and plentiful- or completely complete.
Stay strong, my gorgeous relator- or whoever decides to read this- You are important.
January 5, 2015
Online Diary: Cami, Sam and... an extra someone?!
Hello future me!
This blog post is going to be focused on a couple of topics, but the main one being Cami and Sam.
I'm super excited to announce that I have spoken to them again, and it's as if our friendship was never on hold! As if those months meant NOTHING.
They welcomed me back into their lives quite quickly, and its refreshing to see how much they've grown and matured over my long break.
I left Cami a message on her social media wall telling her I missed her, and surprisingly she replied really quickly!
She told me how much she dreaded my absence and couldn't wait for Sam to see me.
Although I missed Sam a ton, I was almost too embarrassed to see him again. I felt he wouldn't accept me as quickly as Cami had, and that I would have to work for his trust again.
Sadly, I was right. He didn't accept me as quickly, but around day 2 of forcefully applying myself into his life, he agreed he'd wanted me to stay.
And here is where it gets exciting- they brought a new 'someone' into the equation. This someone is a boy whom knows Sam in real life.His name is Danny. He's shy and cute and blushes- I absolutely love him!
I've been forming a slight teeny weeenyyyy crush on Danny... But if you know me in real life, you know how much I hate getting crushes on people. It ALWAYS ends horribly for me.
But anyway, back to Danny.
Cami knows about my liking to Danny, and she does everything she can to make me feel awkward. (In a joking way, of course!) For example, let me quote you a conversation that happened just yesterday. (Btw, Sam does tease me as well - he just doesn't know about my lil crush.)
WARNING: DIRTY CONTENT AHEAD. BEWARE.
MAIN GROUP CHAT:
(Currently Sam is on google earth showing us random places around the world that he's been too.)
Sam: Hey look Danny, thats the same size as your D!
Me: OMG Sam stop
Cami: {My name} would know that. ;)
Me: IM GAGGING
Cami: On his D. ;)
Yup. That's Cami and Sam for you. Poor Danny is blushing up a storm during this conversation.
Anyway, on to another topic I wanted to write about on here.
Some of you may be wondering where my new years resolution post is, and what kind of things I want to accomplish this year...
Honestly, I have none. I don't really come up with new years resolutions because if I find something I dislike about myself, I don't want to wait until the next new years just to say that I can officially start changing my ways.
Therefor, I simply do not have a new year resolutions. But if you reallyyy want me to write some down for you, I'll do it. Here they are:
-Eat healthier
-Exercise more
-Spend less time on the internet
-Socialize more
Yup, pretty basic. I know.
This blog post is going to be focused on a couple of topics, but the main one being Cami and Sam.
I'm super excited to announce that I have spoken to them again, and it's as if our friendship was never on hold! As if those months meant NOTHING.
They welcomed me back into their lives quite quickly, and its refreshing to see how much they've grown and matured over my long break.
I left Cami a message on her social media wall telling her I missed her, and surprisingly she replied really quickly!
She told me how much she dreaded my absence and couldn't wait for Sam to see me.
Although I missed Sam a ton, I was almost too embarrassed to see him again. I felt he wouldn't accept me as quickly as Cami had, and that I would have to work for his trust again.
Sadly, I was right. He didn't accept me as quickly, but around day 2 of forcefully applying myself into his life, he agreed he'd wanted me to stay.
And here is where it gets exciting- they brought a new 'someone' into the equation. This someone is a boy whom knows Sam in real life.His name is Danny. He's shy and cute and blushes- I absolutely love him!
I've been forming a slight teeny weeenyyyy crush on Danny... But if you know me in real life, you know how much I hate getting crushes on people. It ALWAYS ends horribly for me.
But anyway, back to Danny.
Cami knows about my liking to Danny, and she does everything she can to make me feel awkward. (In a joking way, of course!) For example, let me quote you a conversation that happened just yesterday. (Btw, Sam does tease me as well - he just doesn't know about my lil crush.)
WARNING: DIRTY CONTENT AHEAD. BEWARE.
MAIN GROUP CHAT:
(Currently Sam is on google earth showing us random places around the world that he's been too.)
Sam: Hey look Danny, thats the same size as your D!
Me: OMG Sam stop
Cami: {My name} would know that. ;)
Me: IM GAGGING
Cami: On his D. ;)
Yup. That's Cami and Sam for you. Poor Danny is blushing up a storm during this conversation.
Anyway, on to another topic I wanted to write about on here.
Some of you may be wondering where my new years resolution post is, and what kind of things I want to accomplish this year...
Honestly, I have none. I don't really come up with new years resolutions because if I find something I dislike about myself, I don't want to wait until the next new years just to say that I can officially start changing my ways.
Therefor, I simply do not have a new year resolutions. But if you reallyyy want me to write some down for you, I'll do it. Here they are:
-Eat healthier
-Exercise more
-Spend less time on the internet
-Socialize more
Yup, pretty basic. I know.
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